sad day for unbelievers

i'm off to a bad start.

i feel i'm hopeless. i feel that i'm doing things wrong all the time. because i don't think anybody appreciatea what i do. i know how to appreciate. little things. big achievements. kind gestures. talent. attitude. practically anything about everything, i can appreciate. funny how i am unable to get the same response. specially from the people i look up to, for appreciation.

i'm being pessimistic about things lately. i have this odd feeling that bad luck has taken hold of me.

my heart is bleeding, but i am unable to cry.

i need peace of mind. i need good luck. i need strength. i need salvation. i need relief. i need forgiveness. i need comfort. i need enlightenment. i need my memories. i need love. i need appreciation. i need strength of will. i need an attitude overhaul. i need a change of perspective. i need a fresh outlook on things.

i need to believe in fairy tales.

because fairy tales, unlike some people's realities, have happy endings. i need a fairy tale.

i need to believe.